Focus Reclaimed

Can Happiness Be a Choice? Define Your Success

Aria Kaori NakamuraAria Kaori Nakamura
6 min read

A mentor posed a profound question to me recently—one that brings everything to a halt. It's not outrageous in nature, but rather astonishing because it feels like it should have been posed at every pivotal moment in your journey. Providing a sincere response to this inquiry possesses the power to m

A mentor posed a profound question to me recently—one that brings everything to a halt. It's not outrageous in nature, but rather astonishing because it feels like it should have been posed at every pivotal moment in your journey. Providing a sincere response to this inquiry possesses the power to mold every action you take and every element you welcome into your existence. It cuts through the unnecessary clutter that arises from constantly measuring ourselves against others. This could well be the single most vital question you'll ever pose to yourself, as it compels you to recognize the disparities between your current reality and your desired destination.

What Does Success Truly Mean to You?

Prior to formulating your response, consider envisioning success as a meticulously crafted recipe. Picture savoring a morsel of exquisite artisan chocolate, indulging in a glass of premium reserve wine, or enjoying the delightful crunch of pizza fresh from a brick oven—these experiences embody what the creator deems the ultimate triumph in culinary artistry.

As you dissect the components that constitute your favorite foods, you begin to discern a deeper element at work. The magic in that unforgettable pizza lies in the unwavering commitment to excellence throughout the entire preparation process.

Certainly, at home, you might assemble a meal with minimal forethought. However, a restaurant could scarcely thrive if it failed to consistently present dishes that align with diners' expectations time after time.

The Challenge of Defining Personal Success

Here's the core issue when it comes to individual success. You likely have a precise sense of the tastes you crave in chocolate, wine, or pizza, yet do you truly understand the essential elements that compose a life brimming with success and deep satisfaction?

Regrettably, very few people possess this insight, largely because societal influences and conventional teachings perpetuate the notion that success boils down to a solitary component: financial wealth.

Money certainly can serve as a foundational ingredient in the recipe for success, much like the dough required for pizza. But imagine consuming a plain piece of dough sans any toppings—it's dull, unexciting, and utterly unsatisfying.

Research from the World Happiness Institute reveals that, despite the United States experiencing substantial economic advancement and wealth accumulation over the last fifty years, this progress has not translated into greater happiness for its population.

If financial abundance fails to elevate happiness levels, then what truly does?

The German philosopher Immanuel Kant, who passed away in 1804, remains one of the most pivotal influencers in Western philosophical history. Comparable to a foundational icon in his field, much like a legendary figure in music, Kant's ideas provoke deep introspection and dismantle ingrained societal misconceptions.

Across his extensive body of work, Kant repeatedly arrived at a key insight: 'We are not rich by what we possess but by what we can do without.'

Kant's Timeless Rules for a Fulfilling Life

This realization propelled Kant to explore what truly enriches existence beyond material possessions. He distilled his findings into three fundamental principles for achieving happiness.

  • Something meaningful to pursue.
  • Something worthy of your affection.
  • Something to inspire your hopes.

Does this framework appear overly simplistic for such an intricate concept? Might it seem implausible as a pathway to greater personal joy? Could something so straightforward genuinely transform your life?

Its simplicity is intentional. The complexity of matters is largely determined by the lens through which we view them.

Our culture conditions us to perceive life as inherently convoluted, suggesting that true happiness demands drastic measures, such as abandoning everything to live as a monk in a remote Himalayan monastery. Steve Jobs, however, pushed back against this mindset. He emphasized that, 'Simple can be harder than complex. You have to work hard to get your thinking clean to make it simple. But it’s worth it in the end, because once you get there, you can move mountains.'

Returning to the essence of success for you personally, this time incorporate fresh elements into the mix. Not merely monetary achievements, but the full spectrum of experiences that infuse your life with depth and fulfillment.

Achieving Clarity Across Key Life Domains

Gaining clear perspective in these ten vital life areas marks the initial phase of implementing Kant's three happiness principles effectively.

  1. Health
  2. Family
  3. Friends
  4. Romantic Relationship
  5. Mission, Career, or Business
  6. Finances
  7. Adventure
  8. Hobby
  9. Spirituality
  10. Emotional Well-being

This is precisely where many individuals falter—they glance at this list and see mere abstract terms devoid of substance. They resemble unadorned dough, lacking any allure. After all, who would settle for bland dough when craving a dish that captivates the senses and draws you back repeatedly?

Reflect on what compels you to select a particular dish from a menu, choose a wine bottle from a display, or decide on your next read. Invariably, it's a compelling description that resonates emotionally, sparking desire and motivating action.

You need not consider yourself a skilled writer for this exercise. Your immediate goal is simply to capture your existing thoughts and commit them to paper.

Guiding Questions to Infuse Flavor into Your Life Areas

To assist in this process and add vividness to each domain, contemplate these three targeted questions.

  1. What does this aspect signify in your personal context?
  2. What benefits or joys does it bring into your life?
  3. Why does it hold such significance for you?

Investing time in this reflection, as few others will, grants you the liberty to lead a life that eludes the majority. Establishing clarity across these domains propels you forward, fulfilling the first happiness rule by providing purposeful activities to engage in.

Overcoming the Urge to Procrastinate

You'll likely face the temptation to postpone this exercise, so heed the wisdom of author James Clear: 'Procrastinating on something important is choosing to delay a better future.'

The effort required to cultivate your own happiness mirrors that expended on merely yearning for change. This foundational step transcends a mere to-do list item; it represents the dawn of an enhanced tomorrow. By defining success on your own terms—beyond financial metrics—you unlock a richer, more intentional path forward, aligning daily actions with Kant's enduring principles for a truly joyful existence.

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